Severe Depression Symptoms: How They Affect Relationships and More

S No.

do not index

ready to publish

backlinks

content score ss

# of words

1239

publish date

Apr 21, 2022

✨POV✨: You can see your relationships changing. You're scared that the growing distance might never be bridged, because (at least right now) you don't know how to. You care about them but don't know how to show them. You're scared they'll mistake your depression for you and leave.

Relationship dynamics shift with us as we evolve and adapt to our changing lives. Sometimes it's for the better - when we learn to draw boundaries with our loved ones, let someone go, grow (and I mean, grow) apart or commit deeply. But other times, it can be unintended or regrettable - when we or a loved one messes up big time, continue a relationship despite its glaring red flags, let someone down, or are disloyal to a loved one. Or act out our depression.

Change is the law of the universe, us, and our relationships. All we can hope and do is make the change a sign of evolution. But alas, it's tricky and challenging as always.

But, very very doable for our relationships.

The Most Tricky Relationship of All 🌋

Between depression and relationships.

The kids (read: people) who need the most love ask for it in the most unloving ways. - Russell Barkley

We all have an inner child who doesn't always know what the right (or adult) thing to do is. As we grow older and experience more, we learn how to navigate the world. But many a time, we forget to learn how to navigate our internal world, where the inner child resides. And when we falter at the pressures of the world, our inner child speaks up and does the best it can.

Depression is often a sign that our inner child is wounded and needs healing. In such times, we may act childish, immature, or unlike our best selves in a relationship. We may project our insecurities, act out of our fears, overthink hastily, or refuse to be vulnerable. We basically flirt with red flags, never wanting to or out of a misplaced sense of self-protection.

And for those of us who have gotten lost in the world of social media, here's a gentle reminder: Not every human mistake is a red flag, but not willing to be better is.

Some of the common severe depression symptoms are 🚧

Aka risk factors (only because each symptoms feeds the other).

Low mood

Feeling hopeless and helpless

Social withdrawal

Feeling anxious, irritable, and agitated

Taking risky decisions and substance abuse

Overthinking

The change in actions or behavior that comes about because of these depression symptoms may be hard for a loved one to understand. And that is fair because we're all just trying to figure out this enigma called 'life'. But what we can do is take a few steps to help ourselves and our loved ones best cope with this common enemy.

How to Treat Depression in Relationships 🩹

Geddit? Iykyk.

When we work on helping our loved ones understand us, we learn to understand and accept ourselves better too. Aaand, did you know that healthy relationships can act like anti-depressants? If you didn’t, click here to know more.

Here's how you can stop depression from being a downer in your relationship too:

🪟 Be as open, clear, and transparent as you can

Those days are gone when vulnerability was a sign of weakness. Our strength lies in working with what is present now-and-here and using it as a stepping stone to becoming better versions of ourselves. If depression is knocking on our doors, it is. There's no point in pretending like the elephant isn't already lounging in the room.

In (and for) our relationships, we need to acknowledge and communicate our needs honestly (and for that, we need to know what they are). Do we need them to gently acknowledge us when we are being out of character, give us space, or remind us that everything will be alright? Do we need to draw boundaries with them - what we're okay with discussing and what not, how we wish to be supported, and the triggers they need to be mindful and sensitive about?

It is on us to help them be on the same page as us - what our state of mind is, what we need, whether they can help or how much time we need.

The core question to be considered here is: What do we need and how can our loved one be included on this journey?

Having code words or safe words can be an easy and effective way of communication in tough times.

And always remember, our depression is not us. It is only an indicator that we need to take care of ourselves with more vigor and kindness. And when you think, ‘I wish I could just talk to someone’, just do it (or maybe the mini-therapy).

💟 Help and check-in with ourselves

This is sooo important.

For the relationship to flourish, we need to feel more like ourselves (which depression comes in the way of). And since the only way forward is through: we need to first be there for ourselves and think, ‘I want to improve my relationship with myself’.

In being there, we learn to re-parent our wounded inner child. Understanding the wounds, how they were formed, what it will take to heal them, and who we want to be once they are healed - all help us better understand what our needs are. From ourselves, our relationships, and our environments.

We are the first and most important step in our healing journey. When we give our thoughts, feelings, fears, mistakes, and imperfections our time, we are automatically teaching ourselves whom to prioritize. And we need to always remember to be kind and patient with our journey - it's not easy but how we do it, counts a lot.

Journaling, affirmations, mini-therapy, and therapy are all ways in which we can be there for ourselves.

If we don't understand and accept ourselves on a deep level (being aware of our biases, prejudices, tendencies, and patterns), we wouldn't know how to become who we want to be (someone who has overcome depression and is the best version of themselves). It's straightforward - we water the plant and not the weed.

The core questions here are: Who are we? Who does depression make us? And who do we want to be?

Having the answer to these questions gives us the 'how to' to our destination.

Last Word on Mental Health 🤍

And the greatest gift that anyone dealing with depression can give their loved one is healing. To grow, evolve and overcome depression is definitely a big win, for everyone.

By working on nurturing growth in our relationship (the hardest on the darkest days), depression gets sidelined and kicked out of the love-triangle. And happily ever after, the relationship continues to grow through all incoming attacks and threats.

Note on Mental Disorders🚩

Depression (aka clinical depression, according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual) is a mental illness that can be of two different types - mild depression (aka persistent depressive disorder) and major depression (aka severe depression or major depressive disorder). A person’s depression symptoms can include prolonged depressed mood, low self-esteem, mood swings, loss of interest, and having trouble focusing. If you have symptoms of severe depression (medically reviewed and diagnosed by licensed mental health professionals) or thoughts of self-harm, please use the national suicide prevention lifeline or contact a mental health professional to seek treatment options.

It is also common for other mood disorders like bipolar disorder or premenstrual dysphoric disorder to occur alongside clinical depression. Antidepressant medications may be prescribed in the case of severe symptoms, in combination with a form of therapy such as interpersonal therapy or brain stimulation therapy .